for the young adults feeling lost

Yesterday I had a deep conversation with a coworker that really stayed with me. With my Gemini mind (and four placements at that), it can be hard for me to step outside my own perceptions — but I couldn’t help being in awe of how his mind works. The quick wit, the way he can internalize, process, and articulate ideas in such a short amount of time… it’s a gift I felt compelled to reflect back to him.

He shared that he’s unsure about what he wants to pursue. Going back to school is an option — especially with the way many of us were raised, where higher education is seen as the “right” path in our Asian households. But in today’s economy, it’s not that simple. There’s time, energy, and the reality of debt to consider. I told him his experience is valid, and that so many young adults are quietly navigating the same uncertainty.

I offered some suggestions, not telling him what to do, but opening his mind to the endless possibilities that exist beyond the traditional route. I shared pieces of my own journey of “finding myself” (which is really just a more graceful way of saying: I’m one of the eldest on our team, so listen to your seasoned padawan mentor hahaa).

One thing about adulthood that no one warns us about is how normal it is to feel lost. To question your path. To wonder if you’re doing “enough,” being “enough,” or moving fast enough. I’ve been through this cycle more times than I can count — and honestly, it has shaped me into who I am.

After conversations with people I care about (including the one that inspired this whole post), I realized: so many of us feel this way, but we rarely say it out loud.

So here are my recommendations if you’re feeling lost — not from a pedestal, but from lived experience, eight businesses, identity deaths and rebirths, spiritual awakenings, and many humbling detours.

1. Dig deeper into what you actually desire — beyond expectations.

The very first step is brutal honesty with yourself.

I always tell people:

don’t put pressure on yourself to have everything figured out.

If that were the standard, I would’ve never started eight different businesses, explored different healing modalities, pivoted careers multiple times, or taken leaps I had no roadmap for.

A lot of us — especially within Asian households — grow up measuring our worth through achievement, stability, and what looks “respectable” on paper. So of course when we feel lost, the shame hits fast.

But clarity doesn’t come from pressure.

It comes from curiosity.

Doing inner work helps you explore:

• What are my actual values?

• Where do my natural talents sit?

• What do I genuinely want to offer to my community?

• Does this path feel aligned with the version of me living my best life?

You can’t make aligned decisions if you’re disconnected from your own desires.

And you can’t hear your desires if you’re drowning in noise, expectations, or comparison.

2. You need to try things — because clarity comes from experience, not thinking.

This is the part most people hate, but it’s the truth.

When I was considering hypnotherapy as a path, my partner said something so simple:

“Why don’t you talk to someone who’s actually in the field?”

At first I was like… duh, why didn’t I think of that?

But that’s exactly what happens when you’re stuck — your mind spirals instead of taking action.

So I booked a session.

I told the practitioner the truth:

• I had imposter syndrome.

• I was scared I could never be at her level.

• I didn’t know if this was the “right” path for me.

And she gave me advice that completely shifted how I saw myself and this profession.

That one experience was enough to confirm:

yes, this is aligned with me.

You really don’t know until you try something.

And that’s where the “monkey mind” gets dangerous — it convinces you you’re not ready, not capable, or not worthy before you even take the first step.

When you’re exploring a new direction, ask yourself:

• How does this feel in my body?

• Do I feel expanded or contracted?

• Does this spark something in me or drain something from me?

Your intuition will always give you an answer — but you have to be willing to experiment long enough to hear it.

This is how you build a relationship with your inner being. The more you practice feeling into your path instead of thinking your way into your path, the clearer your guidance will be.

3. Assume you already have what you want — and live from that identity now.

This is something I learned through the Law of Assumption, and it changed everything for me.

The idea is simple:

You become the version of yourself who already has what you desire, *before* the evidence shows up.

If your goal is to become healthier, you ask:

How does a healthy person act today?

If your goal is to find your purpose, you ask:

What does a purposeful person spend their energy on?

The universe responds to who you *are being*, not what you’re wishing for.

4. Surrender your timeline — this is the one that saved me in 2024.

Let me be honest:

in 2024, I was so desperate to find my “next big thing” that I would spend hours researching, panicking, sulking, and trying to force clarity.

I had created this belief that:

“I can’t be happy or successful until I have the thing I want.”

And that belief slowed down everything.

I didn’t realize that my need for certainty was blocking my intuition, blocking opportunities, and blocking creativity. I was gripping so tightly that nothing could flow.

When I finally surrendered — truly surrendered — everything changed.

I focused on:

• what I could control

• doing things that lit me up

• being a good person

• trusting that what’s meant for me will always find me

And the moment I shifted into that energy?

Ideas started landing effortlessly.

New connections appeared.

Opportunities flowed in without force.

It all aligned because I stopped trying to control the how and let myself be guided.

You’re in the exact part of your journey where identity is dissolving so a new one can emerge.

Feeling lost isn’t a sign you’re going the wrong way — it’s a sign you’re about to find a truer version of yourself.

Give yourself grace.

Get curious.

Take small steps.

Ask your inner world for answers instead of external noise.

And surrender the timeline, because alignment cannot be rushed.

Everything you’re seeking is already seeking you.

You don’t need to have the whole path mapped out. You don’t need a perfect plan. You just need the willingness to look inward, try things without attachment, trust your intuition, and embody the version of you who already knows where she’s going. The universe meets you halfway when you meet yourself first.

Because the moment you stop forcing and start flowing, life has a funny way of revealing exactly where you’re meant to be — and who you’re meant to become.

You’re not lost. You’re simply becoming.